Since the day we are born, we find ourselves raised up in a family or in a wider community with certain habits, and without much thinking we integrate the same habits-- or painkillers into our lives.
At home, the habit of always having the TV turned on, with no much filtering of what is coming out of this small screen and getting into our minds; the habit of opening the fridge late at night and getting whatever is there into our mouths.
And then with our friends, we go out, smoke shisha and cigarettes after work mindlessly just to make the pain a little less, not thinking much about what kind of poison we're getting into our bodies and how it'll affect us ten years from now. We spend the after work hours backstabbing people we don't like, making dirty jokes and engaging in violent conversations .
And then at night before sleeping, we run away from the cruelty of life by fantasizing a different life full of love and butterflies..sometimes, sleep never comes and we spend the whole night with our mind racing from one memory to another---crying the past and fearing the future.
Well, that was my life until recently. Running in a wheel that never stops, with guilt building up slowly until a thick wall came up that blocked my vision and choked my soul.
Back to the questions dilemma, I had lots of questions and for my good, I kept asking them, every single day. Yes, I was lost in the daily hypnosis, yet my only refuge were the questions I had in my mind. Until one day, a voice dominated my mind and ordered me to "leave it all."-- to take a break from life, from the daily routine, from work and people I see everyday, and chase my questions. It was crazy for me at first, how can I leave the routine I'm used to for years now. I thought I might die. I was wrong. It turned out that I was in fact dying slowly and this voice was that of my savior trying to wake me up.
And now I in the process of being dehypnotized .I can feel every single pain in my body and around me without having to run away from it--but embracing it, listening to it and responding. I quit many of the habits that were dragging me even further into the darkened circle and working on cultivating positive ones instead.
So, here is my two cents out of all of this , never ignore the questions you have in your mind; make sure to have silent times during the day to hear that inner voice inside of you and get back to your senses. And above all, be mindful of your daily practices-why you do them and what are you trying to run away from..That's the first step towards an awakened life.
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Namaste!
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